Sandcastles

The stick broke again, as he

carved out a ridge in the mound of sand.

She walked in and stood near by,

He smiled, and she waved a shy hand.

A casual nod was invitation enough,

She daintily ambled across the beach.

Her eyes spoke of stories many,

Her cheeks reflected a ruddy peach.

The boy extended a muddy hand,

Few words, and the acquaintance grew.

She saw he was busy building a sand castle,

And asked if she could help too.

He gleefully handed her a shovel,

They set to work with unusual zeal.

As they carefully moulded shapes aplenty,

The unsaid bond they both could feel.

Their castle, as they called it, was taking shape,

All the hard work was bearing fruit.

She had gone to fetch some more water,

But, on her way back, took a longer route.

An hour and a quarter later, she returned,

Wearing an expression yet unseen.

She spoke of other castles around, and how theirs

Wasn't as perfect as some others had been.

A little effort will make it so, the boy beseeched,

But something inside her heart had died.

She had wanted earnestly to take it to close,

But now nor time, nor effort she could bide.

The beach lured her no more, she walked away,

Before the boy could his dismay voice.

He tried hard to reason the turn of events,

Unperturbed by the sea’s rising noise.

He glanced at the castle, and all it could have been,

If only her thoughts had not been led astray.

Just then a wave rumbled right over the rampart,

Sand castles, he realized, are never meant to stay.

Zen and the Art of housefly termination

When it comes to evading capture/ death, houseflies are like the Charles Sobhraj of the insect world. Houseflies, it turns out, see the world in slow motion. As one researcher puts it, houseflies evading swats are like Neo evading those bullets in the Matrix. It has also been studied that they are capable of banking at 90 degree angles almost instantaneously, making evasion of contact lightning quick. 

It is not a trivial matter at all. Numerous stories/ movies highlight the herculean task killing a housefly is. Who can forget the brave little tailor who killed seven in one blow? Or Mr. Miyagi talking about focus while trying to capture a fly using chopsticks. Or the most hilarious and telling references in Eega by SS Rajamouli (or Makkhi in Hindi) where the hero reincarnates as a housefly and wreaks havoc in the villain's life. If you haven't seen this one, you must. It is probably the third most played movie on TV after Sooryavansham & Jaani Dushman (not the Sonu Nigam one) - so, you won't have to wait too long.

This pursuit of flies has driven humans to engineer some extremely innovative (and some ghastly) means of singular destruction. 

Didn't see that coming...

The fly swatter - This thing is a work of bloody genius. I remember the introduction of the fly swatter to me as a young kid, and it totally blew me away. All those years of fruitlessly slapping our hands together, sometimes knocking items over, and in comes this harmless looking spatula that is a 100% times more successful. 

It took me some time to understand that not only does the partly flexible design help the swatter act like a whip aiding a quick and sharp swatting action, but its pores also create a suction which draws in the fly during approach. Imagine the WTF moment this must have caused for the first fly who bore the brunt of this. And since I don't really believe flies have a very organised social system wherein they would discuss threats to the species, the fly swatter would have been the cause of last minute bewilderment for a lot of flies.

Game. Set. Zap.

The bug zapper - Nothing, however, compares to the brutality of a bug zapper. Have the PETA ever spoken against this? I am not sure, and I am amazed considering how some of their concerns are rather ludicrous. This device is pure evil.

It's the fly equivalent of getting the chair. And although I have personally relished being Sampras and Sauron rolled into one, and zapping a whole school of flies in one go, it is disturbing that that has been recreation for a lot of us. 

There's the big box version of this too replete with purple-white tube lights - the metallic Mareech who draws the playful flies with its glittering appeal and then becomes their nemesis. 

Unaided assault

What if you do not have any of the above devices and are infuriated, annoyed and almost over the edge with that one single fly zooming from one corner to the other? There is hope. However, first you must breathe. Rash swatting hardly ever wins over a housefly. 

There are a few things one needs to be careful about. Flies, as mentioned earlier, have a heightened sense of perception (as they are seeing things in slow motion) - so, a change in lighting is sure to be sensed. This fact is useful in determining the direction of approach especially in unaided palm attacks. The diagram here shows what to and what not to do.

What else? Remember, thanks to their perception of time, the fly is a fraction of a second ahead of you. So, you do not plan to kill it at t = t* (where t* is the moment of impact) but at,

t = t*+α where α is ~1/30th of a second

Contrary to common perception, flies travel at 4-5 km/h which is ~1m/s, so this amounts to covering 3-5 cm of the region around impact.

If all this math fails, our last resort is to call Vidya Balan and let her talk the flies into submission.